tinantravis
08-12-2006, 01:35 PM
Isaiah’s life story begins in December 2005 when we were blessed with the news we were pregnant. (Surprisingly, getting pregnant was much easier the second-time around!) Each day brought new dreams and hopes as we anticipated our new arrival. The excitement grew each time we were able to hear the heartbeat, see our baby on the ultrasound screen, or feel movement. Big brother Ethan (1 year old) could also tell there was change in the air. He was mesmerized with my growing belling and when asked, “Where’s baby?” Ethan would lift up my shirt and give a big poke. About a month ago, he started giving “raspberries” to my belly and even started to point to daddy’s belly saying “baby.” In Ethan’s eyes, everyone had a baby in their stomach. Ethan’s occasional hugs and kisses to my growing belly told us that he loved baby Isaiah even before he was born.
It was only eight weeks before our due date that we discovered that there might be something wrong. Having been diagnosed with a minor case of preeclampsia, a visit to a perinatal physician at UnitedHospital was scheduled for Friday, June 2nd. We went to the appointment thinking it was just another visit to help figure out why I had “Princess Fiona feet” and was spilling protein. As part of the initial screening, a detailed ultrasound was taken. For two hours, doctors and ultrasound technicians moved in and out of the room. They would point at the screen and use language we couldn’t understand. “What is wrong,” we asked, but a response wasn’t necessary because their faces told us that we were there for much more than a preeclampsia consultation.
There was nothing anyone could do to prepare us for the news we were about to hear in the small, dark room. The glowing screen outlined Isaiah's beautiful body. As the doctor described some of the abnormalities and defects that they saw on the ultrasound, we wanted to wake-up from the nightmare that had seemed to take over our minds. We struggled to catch our breaths as the doctor said phrases like “heart defects, one kidney, small stomach, narrow heart vessels.” I kept thinking, “What does it all mean? Why didn't the four ultrasounds I had prior to this one see those same defects? You are wrong!! Those conditions must belong to someone else, not our baby, not the baby we had planned for eight months, felt move, and protected!”
In order to know the seriousness of the defects and to determine a plan of action for the baby’s delivery, an amniocentesis was drawn. We left the office with the best case scenario: Down’s syndrome and immediate heart surgery after birth. We were still hopeful…at least we were going to have a baby.
Three days later on June 5th, the devastating news about our baby’s future had arrived. I was home alone to receive the news. The genetic counselor explained, “I wish I was calling you to tell you that your baby had Down’s, but that’s not the case. The amniocentesis results indicate that your baby boy has a condition called type XXY triploidy, which is a chromosomal defect that happens at fertilization and is not compatible with life.” At this point my world stopped, the rug had been pulled out from under my feet. I dropped the phone, cradled my stomach, fell to the floor, and sobbed uncontrollably. “What did it all mean, what did ‘incompatible with life’ mean? How can that be true when I can feel him move?” I didn’t have the strength to pick the phone back up so the genetic counselor hung up and called my mom, one of my emergency contacts. I’m not sure how the conversation went, but the genetic counselor was able to explain to my mom that triploidy is caused when there is a complete extra set of chromosomes; instead of having forty-six chromosomes (one set of twenty-three from each parent), a baby with triploidy has sixty-nine chromosomes. Since 1950, there have only been 50 documented cases where the baby survived to the third trimester. Isaiah would be #51. Doctors didn’t even know if Isaiah would make it through delivery. I still didn’t understand how a baby so active in utero could be incompatible with life. The next two days I walked around in numbness, sure that they would call and tell me that they made a mistake. I began to treasure every flutter, movement, hiccup, feeling of queasiness; all the things that I complained about months before. There’s nothing that can prepare you for the news that your child is going to die.
However, that phone call never came and Isaiah was ready to make his debute. Nature soon began to run its course to allow us to meet our baby boy. Only three days after hearing the news, on early Thursday morning, June 8th at 12:35 am, baby Isaiah was born naturally weighing 3 pounds, 10½ ounces. His fighting personality remained strong as I heard the doctor exclaim, “Ouch! He bit me!” As Isaiah was put into my arms, I embraced his fragile body. Then remarkably, his eyes opened. Travis and I gazed into his eyes, touched his skin, and our spirits connected. He looked so much like his brother…wavy hair, cute button nose, long fingers, and large feet. Every wrinkle of his skin and curve of his face is permanently sketched in the inside of my eyelids. He was so perfect (which ultimately made this process even harder to understand). He was just beautiful.
In the hour he was alive, we were able to tell him about his family, embrace him, kiss him, and tell him how much he was loved, even though we already knew he knew. His heart raced each time we talked to him. In hopes of spending more time with him, we just kept talking. We absorbed every minute. We can’t express how beautiful our time with Isaiah was…there just aren’t any words.
Other highlights of our time with Isaiah include watching him meet his loving grandparents, giving him a bath, dressing, weighing, and measuring him, and also watching my mom baptize him. These moments were captured by Heather Hom-Lombardo, who volunteers her talents through Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a non-profit organization that takes photos of terminally ill infants. Whether it is through these photos, images in our minds, our just timeless memories, we are able to cherish every moment with our little angel. We truly felt we were blessed by two angels that day, our precious baby boy Isaiah, and Heather, our photographer, who captured all the moments we never wanted to forget. These photos tell Isaiah’s story and will one day help tell the story to Isaiah’s big brother, Ethan, who is just too young to understand what happened to his baby brother.
Around 1:30, I felt Isaiah pass through me right after he took his last breath. Despite all the emotion I was feeling, I felt lighter and calmer. We held him outright and gave him to God, allowing him to join the angels and God shortly thereater. Though our hearts were hurting and continue to hurt, we felt comforted to be blessed with Isaiah. He was our child to be shared with God. We spent the rest of the next day with our son before laying him to rest.
Isaiah was buried on Monday, June 12th, 2006. We held a “celebration of life” service, singing “Jesus Loves Me” and “Jesus Loves the Little Children”. Pastor John Hanson shared the life lessons to be learned from Isaiah’s life. Family and friends were surrounded by the beautiful pictures of Isaiah. The young children who attended the service released balloons after Isaiah’s burial as a way to celebrate his life. Involving the children and hearing them celebrate, laughing, and asking questions was moving. It was clear that Isaiah’s short life here on earth had an enormous impact on everyone that day.
Guided by our faith and surrounded by supportive family and friends, our lives have been truly touched and changed forever.
Goodbye our love, we anticipate the day when we can hold you again.
It was only eight weeks before our due date that we discovered that there might be something wrong. Having been diagnosed with a minor case of preeclampsia, a visit to a perinatal physician at UnitedHospital was scheduled for Friday, June 2nd. We went to the appointment thinking it was just another visit to help figure out why I had “Princess Fiona feet” and was spilling protein. As part of the initial screening, a detailed ultrasound was taken. For two hours, doctors and ultrasound technicians moved in and out of the room. They would point at the screen and use language we couldn’t understand. “What is wrong,” we asked, but a response wasn’t necessary because their faces told us that we were there for much more than a preeclampsia consultation.
There was nothing anyone could do to prepare us for the news we were about to hear in the small, dark room. The glowing screen outlined Isaiah's beautiful body. As the doctor described some of the abnormalities and defects that they saw on the ultrasound, we wanted to wake-up from the nightmare that had seemed to take over our minds. We struggled to catch our breaths as the doctor said phrases like “heart defects, one kidney, small stomach, narrow heart vessels.” I kept thinking, “What does it all mean? Why didn't the four ultrasounds I had prior to this one see those same defects? You are wrong!! Those conditions must belong to someone else, not our baby, not the baby we had planned for eight months, felt move, and protected!”
In order to know the seriousness of the defects and to determine a plan of action for the baby’s delivery, an amniocentesis was drawn. We left the office with the best case scenario: Down’s syndrome and immediate heart surgery after birth. We were still hopeful…at least we were going to have a baby.
Three days later on June 5th, the devastating news about our baby’s future had arrived. I was home alone to receive the news. The genetic counselor explained, “I wish I was calling you to tell you that your baby had Down’s, but that’s not the case. The amniocentesis results indicate that your baby boy has a condition called type XXY triploidy, which is a chromosomal defect that happens at fertilization and is not compatible with life.” At this point my world stopped, the rug had been pulled out from under my feet. I dropped the phone, cradled my stomach, fell to the floor, and sobbed uncontrollably. “What did it all mean, what did ‘incompatible with life’ mean? How can that be true when I can feel him move?” I didn’t have the strength to pick the phone back up so the genetic counselor hung up and called my mom, one of my emergency contacts. I’m not sure how the conversation went, but the genetic counselor was able to explain to my mom that triploidy is caused when there is a complete extra set of chromosomes; instead of having forty-six chromosomes (one set of twenty-three from each parent), a baby with triploidy has sixty-nine chromosomes. Since 1950, there have only been 50 documented cases where the baby survived to the third trimester. Isaiah would be #51. Doctors didn’t even know if Isaiah would make it through delivery. I still didn’t understand how a baby so active in utero could be incompatible with life. The next two days I walked around in numbness, sure that they would call and tell me that they made a mistake. I began to treasure every flutter, movement, hiccup, feeling of queasiness; all the things that I complained about months before. There’s nothing that can prepare you for the news that your child is going to die.
However, that phone call never came and Isaiah was ready to make his debute. Nature soon began to run its course to allow us to meet our baby boy. Only three days after hearing the news, on early Thursday morning, June 8th at 12:35 am, baby Isaiah was born naturally weighing 3 pounds, 10½ ounces. His fighting personality remained strong as I heard the doctor exclaim, “Ouch! He bit me!” As Isaiah was put into my arms, I embraced his fragile body. Then remarkably, his eyes opened. Travis and I gazed into his eyes, touched his skin, and our spirits connected. He looked so much like his brother…wavy hair, cute button nose, long fingers, and large feet. Every wrinkle of his skin and curve of his face is permanently sketched in the inside of my eyelids. He was so perfect (which ultimately made this process even harder to understand). He was just beautiful.
In the hour he was alive, we were able to tell him about his family, embrace him, kiss him, and tell him how much he was loved, even though we already knew he knew. His heart raced each time we talked to him. In hopes of spending more time with him, we just kept talking. We absorbed every minute. We can’t express how beautiful our time with Isaiah was…there just aren’t any words.
Other highlights of our time with Isaiah include watching him meet his loving grandparents, giving him a bath, dressing, weighing, and measuring him, and also watching my mom baptize him. These moments were captured by Heather Hom-Lombardo, who volunteers her talents through Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, a non-profit organization that takes photos of terminally ill infants. Whether it is through these photos, images in our minds, our just timeless memories, we are able to cherish every moment with our little angel. We truly felt we were blessed by two angels that day, our precious baby boy Isaiah, and Heather, our photographer, who captured all the moments we never wanted to forget. These photos tell Isaiah’s story and will one day help tell the story to Isaiah’s big brother, Ethan, who is just too young to understand what happened to his baby brother.
Around 1:30, I felt Isaiah pass through me right after he took his last breath. Despite all the emotion I was feeling, I felt lighter and calmer. We held him outright and gave him to God, allowing him to join the angels and God shortly thereater. Though our hearts were hurting and continue to hurt, we felt comforted to be blessed with Isaiah. He was our child to be shared with God. We spent the rest of the next day with our son before laying him to rest.
Isaiah was buried on Monday, June 12th, 2006. We held a “celebration of life” service, singing “Jesus Loves Me” and “Jesus Loves the Little Children”. Pastor John Hanson shared the life lessons to be learned from Isaiah’s life. Family and friends were surrounded by the beautiful pictures of Isaiah. The young children who attended the service released balloons after Isaiah’s burial as a way to celebrate his life. Involving the children and hearing them celebrate, laughing, and asking questions was moving. It was clear that Isaiah’s short life here on earth had an enormous impact on everyone that day.
Guided by our faith and surrounded by supportive family and friends, our lives have been truly touched and changed forever.
Goodbye our love, we anticipate the day when we can hold you again.