Tammy
11-28-2005, 12:50 PM
The holidays are especially difficult for my family and I. Two years ago I lost my stepmom and mother to cancer; both in the same year, four months and one day apart. My stepmom died June 25, my mom October 26, and then two years later my little Chase on August 25. I still to this day struggle with comming to terms of losing my mom(s), and now trying to deal with the recent loss of my baby on top of it all. Some days it's amazing to me I'm still here.... but my husband, two boys, family and good friends keep me going. Yesterday (Nov. 27) was especially difficult. We went to my dad's for dinner and to draw names for Christmas gifts. The whole time I kept thinking about Chase, and how his name should be included too. I then realized how empty the house felt, without another important family member there. It just doesn't seem fair, but then again, what is fair in this life? Not too much, I don't think. I am humbly grateful for what I do have... I realize life could be alot worse. I think of the father who recently lost his wife and his baby... my prayers go out to him and his family. I also think of the first time parents who have lost their child, and my heart goes out to them as well. Everything in life is so unpredictable and uncertain. Out of all of this I have learned to not take anything for granted. After all, nothing is ever guaranteed....