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B Storm
10-19-2006, 04:30 PM
AUGUST 23 , 2006, is a day that my husband David and I will never forget. I was 38.5-39 weeks pregnant. We all were very happy knowing that our baby boy was soon to come. I had two cousins that recently had miscarriages. When that happened, I told my husband I was thankful that we did not have a miscarriage. Our new baby would not replace their grief, but bring a sense of hope. It started as any other ordinary day. We took our daughter(Her name is Lilly, she is 3 and a half) to daycare. My husband and I went to work together. Little did we know this would be one of the most horrifying days of our entire life. We arrived home in the afternoon, I had not felt our baby boy move all day. I told David that I was going to call the doctor. The doctor's office told me to come in for a fetal monitoring. Before I left for the doctor, I told David that their probably was nothing to worry about. I would be right back. My daughter Lilly and David went with me to almost every appointment. When I arrived at the doctors office. My nurse, Sally hooked me up to the monitor. Their was no heart beat. ( I know that God was protecting me at this time because I did not get what was happening and I was not to concerned.) YET. She said to me, Sometimes it is hard to pick up these heart beats. I was sent to another room for an ultrasound. My two special nurses were in the room with me(Amanda and Sally) and my doctors partner. When we looked at the ultrasound and saw that beautiful baby boy and no heart beat. I could of died. Sheer terror filled my body.:eek: The doctor confirmed that their
was no heart beat. I began to scream and sob. How could a pregnancy that was so right go so wrong. My first pregnancy, I was throwing up all of the time. This pregnancy I had very few of those symptoms. My first immediate thoughts were, Was their something that I did to cause this.
My husband and sister Danelle were called to be with me. These are two of my many earthly angels. We all cried and cried. I immediately wanted a C-Section, I wanted to get this over with and move on to healing as quickly as possible. I thought if I could forget about it, I would not feel as much pain. The doc and nurse told me that it was important for me to deliver our baby naturally, less physical pain, then if I would of had a C-section. I agreed. I told the nurse that I did not want to look at our baby boy. I told them to just deliver him and get him out of the room. I figured in my mine that if anyone
else wanted to look at him. They could look at him somewhere else. Nurse Sally gave me a NILMDTS brochure. She told me about this wonderful organization. David told her that we would think about it. I am so thankful and blessed that we did. The doctor told David and I that we would need to report to the hospital at 8:00 P.M.
David went home to make some calls and rearrange kids and schedules. We both our self employed. My sister and I met up with a cousin of mine to eat. I knew this would be the last time I would be eating for a while. I was in such shock I did not eat much. I people watched. [FONT=Comic Sans MS]I had a new and interesting outlook on life, and the way that I looked at people] Nothing so horrifying or cruel really had happened to my family or I before. After supper, I went to my house.
David and I drove to the hospital. We called his family along the way. They all thought this was going to be a joyous call. A call of celebration. Instead, it was calls of sadness and a call to pray. When things are bad, we call everyone we know to pray. When things are exciting, we call everyone to rejoice.
When we arrived at the hospital, we checked in. When I arrived at the door of my room. I stopped and cried. I knew at this point, David and I would need a peace that would pass all of our understanding. Our heavenly father promised us that. We needed to grasp that to get through this. Shortly, after eight the nurse came in and started my IV's. My doctor came in. We formulated a delivery plan. Our journey would begin. Family would come and go over the next few hours. David and I gained strength through our families support. At this time calls were made to the mortuary, and our NILMDTS photographer.(Tina Marie )We are thankful that we did. We decided that we would bury our baby and have a small graveside service. This would take place after I got out of the hospital. Around 60 people ended up showing up to that service. On August 24, 2006, at 8:30 P.M., (24 hours after entering the hospital) Samuel Taylor Storm was born to heaven. He weighed 7 pounds and 11 ounces. He was 21 and half inches long. David and I had been through so much already. We decided that we would go to sleep, and hold baby Sammy the next day. At around 9:00 A.M., the next day David and I were able to hold Samuel. He was so beautiful. His cold body was warmed by his mommy and daddy's loving arms. We had told our little Lilly of Sammy's death. We thought it was better that she not see him. He had some cuts on his face. David's son Jason who is seventeen did not desire to see him. After a few hours, we gave final hugs and kisses and sent him out with the nurses.:( We chose not to have an autopsy, we choose to believe that
everything happens for a reason. Even if we do not understand it. Someday we will. It does not mean that we do not struggle or not terribly dissapointed. It means that our faith guides us, minute by minute, day by day.
PRESENT DAY-OCTOBER 19, 2006
This past week has certainly been overwhelming.Their has not been a day that I have not cried or been angry at God and the world. I am thankful though. I miss our baby Sam. I hope and pray that God would bless us with another baby. Not to replace Sam, but to add to wonderful family.This website has brought me hope. Angels come in all forms.:)

Brooke Storm

Cheryl Haggard
10-19-2006, 04:47 PM
Oh, Brooke,
Thank you for opening your heart and sharing your story about Samuel with us. You and your family are so in my thoughts and prayers.
Just by reading your words, I personally feel so inspired by your faith at committment. You are truly an amazing woman. Always know that!
I am so glad that you have found us here. There are some amazing people on this forum, and of course we are saddened, but at the same time blessed and honored to add another.
Take care of yourself, and know we are here for you and your family.
Blessings,
Cheryl

Sherry Petri
10-19-2006, 11:00 PM
Brooke,
I am so glad that you were able to share little Sam's life with us. I will be praying that your next week will be better and that once again, you will be given the peace that passes all understanding. For me, each day brings 2 choices. The words to a song that is so dear to me, say this: "on one hand is bitterness, we want to taste it, let the hatred drown our sorrows, but the wise hand opens slowly to lilies of the valley". Sometimes it is so very hard to choose because anger can take the place of sorrow. Sam's story includes a story of the faith that brought you through those early days. That same faith will bring you through the days to come.

Charlene Lopez
10-21-2006, 08:06 PM
Brooke,

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I understand how you described your feelings so very well. Daniel was 38 weeks old and he was fine up until that very last day. I too, had the feeling that I did something wrong but have since come to peace with what was obviously meant to be and you will to in time.

I'm so glad to hear you want to "try again". Again, I felt the same way you described that I wanted my family to grow, not to replace Daniel, but to give us another chance to watch our baby and our family grow. I know you will get your wish. It sounds like you are a very strong person and you have a wonderful support network.

All my best,