Deb Stoner
02-24-2006, 06:19 PM
After we lost our baby I realized the kindness of others, sometimes complete strangers. After reading Tammy's post about the men that dug Chase's grave at the cemetary, it reminded of the acts of kindness that others did for me. I'd like to share them with you.
1. It was about 6 weeks after Marah died and I decided to venture out for one of the first times without my husband or son. You see, I didn't want to be away from them because I was afraid that something would happen to them. I went to a little market, not far from our house looking for something to make me feel better. They have a little flower shoppe with terrific flowers and I was eyeing the tulips (my favorite). A woman who works there had heard of my loss, as she was in my exercise class. She handed me the flowers with a "paid" sticker on them and told me that she had been thinking of baby Marah and hoped that the flowers would brighten my day. I didn't even know her name.
3. I belonged to a Mom's Group when my son was little. I hadn't been to the group in a few years, but the girls knew I loved to garden and heard that I was planning on starting "Marah's Garden" at our cemetary and one at our house. They sent a gift certicate for a fountain in Marah's memory. I don't know many of the moms in the group, but I appreciated their gesture. That fountain now bubbles in Marah's garden every summer.
4. I asked the caretaker at the cemetary where Marah was buried if I could plant flowers on her grave, but it wasn't allowed. A few days later he called me and asked me to come by Marah's grave. He made an area next to the bench in the Garden of the Angels for me to plant perennials. A few of the other moms whose children are buried there tend the garden with me each summer and add flowers of their choice. We use it as a cutting garden so we always have fresh flowers for our babies.
5. Happy birthday cards and wishes sent on Marah's birthday.
6. A scapbooker offered to make a book filled with poems I had written for Marah and for her photos. I didn't have the strength to do it. I love Marah's memory book. She was a friend of a friend-didn't even know her before the book.
So..I could go on, but you get the point. Acts of kindness are so sweet and can come at a time when we really need them! :)
1. It was about 6 weeks after Marah died and I decided to venture out for one of the first times without my husband or son. You see, I didn't want to be away from them because I was afraid that something would happen to them. I went to a little market, not far from our house looking for something to make me feel better. They have a little flower shoppe with terrific flowers and I was eyeing the tulips (my favorite). A woman who works there had heard of my loss, as she was in my exercise class. She handed me the flowers with a "paid" sticker on them and told me that she had been thinking of baby Marah and hoped that the flowers would brighten my day. I didn't even know her name.
3. I belonged to a Mom's Group when my son was little. I hadn't been to the group in a few years, but the girls knew I loved to garden and heard that I was planning on starting "Marah's Garden" at our cemetary and one at our house. They sent a gift certicate for a fountain in Marah's memory. I don't know many of the moms in the group, but I appreciated their gesture. That fountain now bubbles in Marah's garden every summer.
4. I asked the caretaker at the cemetary where Marah was buried if I could plant flowers on her grave, but it wasn't allowed. A few days later he called me and asked me to come by Marah's grave. He made an area next to the bench in the Garden of the Angels for me to plant perennials. A few of the other moms whose children are buried there tend the garden with me each summer and add flowers of their choice. We use it as a cutting garden so we always have fresh flowers for our babies.
5. Happy birthday cards and wishes sent on Marah's birthday.
6. A scapbooker offered to make a book filled with poems I had written for Marah and for her photos. I didn't have the strength to do it. I love Marah's memory book. She was a friend of a friend-didn't even know her before the book.
So..I could go on, but you get the point. Acts of kindness are so sweet and can come at a time when we really need them! :)