help

[chloe's mommy]

ive been ok but now that im back in school, its confusing. i want to finish but i dont want to be there. my teachers have relized that im depressed and most of them know why. but everyone asks me what they can do, thing is that when they ask me that my mind goes blank. lately ive been pushing the subject of her away when people ask me. because its still hurts to talk about and people dont get that. and sometimes when i do want to talk about her no one seems to care. but when they want to talk about it i get all choked up , i know expected right. my mother thinks im hiding from it, that i dont want to believe it still. well shes right i still dont want to except the fact that she is gone, i know that chloe is gone. but i dont want to believe it. if that makes any since at all i dont know. i need help want can i do to let people know exactly how i feel?

[Shelly]

Dear Sayla, I'm sorry it's such an exceedingly difficult time for you right now. The loss of a child is incomprehensible!! I've been wrestling with it for almost 10 years....it's still unbelievable. Intellectually, I know Madeline and Monique are gone. Emotionally, I cannot gasp that they could possibly die. Somedays I just want to shout "HOW CAN IT BE?!?!?!?" I hope it helps in some small way to know that you are not alone in this journey.

You want to talk about Chloe, of course. It's hard for others to hear which, sadly, makes you feel more alone. Remember it OK to cry. You weep because you loved and lost. I wish that weren't the case.....the lost part. Your mom might be having a hard time watching her "baby" sufferingPlus, she has also endured the loss of Chloe.

Do you have any local support groups? Are there any remembrance services happening in your area?

Take good care...I'm thinking of you,
Shelly

[carissa13]

i need help want can i do to let people know exactly how i feel?
Sayla ~ the only way you can let people know exactly how you feel is to tell them. It is okay to cry and to show your emotions. It is not always easy to find a person that wants to listen and someone you want to tell your story to. Don't be afraid to talk about Chloe, your words are what is going to keep her real in your heart. Denial is an easy place to be in, I visit that place sometimes myself but healing can not be found there.
For myself I have found very few people that "want" to talk about Jarell, they would rather act like he was never here. I have accepted that I am the one that is heartbroken, not them. The world seems to lack the emotions to deal with our loss so when you find someone that wants to know about Chloe, tell them your story. The people I least expected to want to know my story have ended up being the greatest listeners. I tell them my story, often in tears and I thank them for wanting to know about Jarell.
Sayla, stay in school! I know it's hard but whether you want to or not, your live will go on and Chloe does not want you to stop living because she knows she will be with you again when your time for Heaven is here. Don't let your heartache determine who you will become, let your love for Chloe give you strength to help others and to educate the world that your loss is real.
It's sounds like you have people around you that love you and are concerned about your well being. Let these people love you and help carry your heavy heart. And give it to God, He will guide you and give you the strength you need to find happiness again.
I am here is you need someone to talk to, we are all here ~ Carissa