George
11-12-2007, 10:49 AM
I'm passing along a story and a prayer request from somone who knows we went through something with the babysitter's family when Ezri died.
George
************************************************** ****
I don't know if you can help point me in the direction of defence, but I am in the middle of a Shaken baby case. We had adopted a little girl from Korea, who from the day we got her at 9 1/2mo. refused food, slept like a newborn, and vomited twice a day on average, up to 6 times, occasionally going two days in a row without vomitting.
Within one week of brining her home we took her to our family Dr. to begin her care. Our Dr was concerned with her head size and shape, and the small size of her soft spot. We saw a neurosurgeon who simply assumed as an orphan she was laid on her back too much. She continued to vomit frequently, and we did blood test and learned nothing. 2 months after we brought her home she had what was later determined to have been a seizure, she had no fever. A couple of weeks later she had an upper GI, which also yeilded no results. We also scheduled with a neurologist, who scheduled an EEG, no answers from this.
This Dr. was reluctant to look any further into her vomiting being a brain issue and supposed the size and shape to be from having been an orphan, until I persisted that it hadn't grown any in the last few months, he decided to schedule An MRI, and Ct scan.(these were scheduled but our daughter passed a few days before the appointment.)
We had begun to see a nutritionist, a phsycologist, and developemental therapist through first steps, we also went to see a gastrointestinal specialist, who performed an EGD, which eventually produced no significant findings. Three days later, she started her morning lethargic, and continued to seem sleepy all day, and conistently refused food, she would simply fall over when I sat her on the floor with her cup.
A few times she fell back on the floor fairly hard. By 6pm, though this is not out of the ordinary in our experience with her, I was gettinng concerned and again trying to coax her into drinking her milk when she quit breathing. I called 911, gave her resue breaths got some foaming stuff out of her mouth, splashed her face with water, pounded on her back to see if she had choked on something. She began breathing once every 15 seconds, this is how she was when the ambulance took her away. I followed with my two (biological) boys. She was life lined from one hospital to another where they eventually indicated after CT scan and other test that her injuries(retinol hemoraging and SUB-DURAL HEMATOMAS were "consistent with non- accidental trauma".
They notified the Department of child services, who questioned my husband and myself our two boys 3 and 5, and immediately took the boys into custody. A flow study was done that determined blood flow was no longer reaching her brain and they immediately discontinued life support and she passed after being with us only 4 months.
They learned nothing damaging by their questioning of the boys, by having them phisically examined by Drs, or by their forced search of our home, yet they remain in foster care where they have been for 6 1/2 weeks while the investigation is ongoing. They are primarily awaiting the results of an autopsy. We have not been charged with anything at this point, though they threaten to charge my husband as well as myself even though he had been gone to work for more than 24 hours at the time.
I did not shake my daughter, and rather than mourning her loss I'm going through this nightmare instead. I do not abuse my boys, but by taking them away, the state is inflicting trauma on them that would be considered abuse. All I am gulity of is loving and brining an orphan into our home. The only thing I could hve done to prevent this was not care about her in the first place.
My boys wanted a sister, I wanted a little girl, It had been an intention since I was a child myself to give a home to a child in need. After a year of paper work, preparations and $30,000, I certainly didn't think it would end up like this. And to know so many others have been wrongly accused, and that there is so much evidence to sugest these injuries can be caused in other ways, it is disgusting to be treated with such bias, and as though I am gulity unless I can prove myself innocent. I don't know what to do.
We have a criminal lawyer trying to keep it out of criminal court, but it seems pretty hopeless. After the adoption expences our resources are pretty tapped out. My boys don't need to lose their sister and their mother. No one who knows me believes for a second I could be guilty. My older brother insists I'm too patient with my children. My pastor tells me repeatedly how everyone at church notices how good I am with children, how I handle sunday school and nursery. My husband and I have been missionaries to other countries and worked in orphanages. If nothing else I would appreciate your added prayers. I was touched by many of the things your site says. "
Nothing can change the tragedy of a baby’s death. But two wrongs do not make a right. Wrongfully depriving innocent children of their mother and a solid, secure childhood home only compounds the tragedy." Thank you.
RRK
Indiana
Can you please say some extra prayers for Kynan and Andy. They're not getting used to the separation like DCS would assume they would. They're crying more and more. Andy is falling apart. When they have to leave after a visit, it's painful for the supervisor to watch. Andy cried, "why does life have to be so terrible right now?" "why can't I sleep in my own bed?" He clings to my neck sobbing all over me, I can't keep it together then either.
Kynan cries, and his face melts and he reaches for me, buries his head in my shoulder, then looks like he just gives up, his face is blank, he's quiet. The supervisor says on the way back to the fosters, he regresses into not speaking. Andy asked for some of my lotion to remember me.
The supervisor told me they continued to talk about it during the drive back, and Andy said, "I just feel like there's no life left in my heart." He said he asks questions a 5 year old shouldn't have to ask.
I'm afraid if Andy keeps having this much trouble separating they'll discontinue visits. It's unbearable for me to have to physically pry his hands off me. I've not been able to convince anyone of the severity of how hard he's dealing with this. He needs some special grace and protection.
The councilor asked if we had any other ideas of what might help comfort them like the lotion, so if anyone else has suggestions.
It's tuff, the foster mom won't let them have food from home cause the other kids can't have it because of allergies, they're not allowed their toys from home because they're reluctant to share with the other children. It will probably be another 2 weeks before a ruling is made on family placement, but we have further documentation that shows more times DCS lied to us.
George
************************************************** ****
I don't know if you can help point me in the direction of defence, but I am in the middle of a Shaken baby case. We had adopted a little girl from Korea, who from the day we got her at 9 1/2mo. refused food, slept like a newborn, and vomited twice a day on average, up to 6 times, occasionally going two days in a row without vomitting.
Within one week of brining her home we took her to our family Dr. to begin her care. Our Dr was concerned with her head size and shape, and the small size of her soft spot. We saw a neurosurgeon who simply assumed as an orphan she was laid on her back too much. She continued to vomit frequently, and we did blood test and learned nothing. 2 months after we brought her home she had what was later determined to have been a seizure, she had no fever. A couple of weeks later she had an upper GI, which also yeilded no results. We also scheduled with a neurologist, who scheduled an EEG, no answers from this.
This Dr. was reluctant to look any further into her vomiting being a brain issue and supposed the size and shape to be from having been an orphan, until I persisted that it hadn't grown any in the last few months, he decided to schedule An MRI, and Ct scan.(these were scheduled but our daughter passed a few days before the appointment.)
We had begun to see a nutritionist, a phsycologist, and developemental therapist through first steps, we also went to see a gastrointestinal specialist, who performed an EGD, which eventually produced no significant findings. Three days later, she started her morning lethargic, and continued to seem sleepy all day, and conistently refused food, she would simply fall over when I sat her on the floor with her cup.
A few times she fell back on the floor fairly hard. By 6pm, though this is not out of the ordinary in our experience with her, I was gettinng concerned and again trying to coax her into drinking her milk when she quit breathing. I called 911, gave her resue breaths got some foaming stuff out of her mouth, splashed her face with water, pounded on her back to see if she had choked on something. She began breathing once every 15 seconds, this is how she was when the ambulance took her away. I followed with my two (biological) boys. She was life lined from one hospital to another where they eventually indicated after CT scan and other test that her injuries(retinol hemoraging and SUB-DURAL HEMATOMAS were "consistent with non- accidental trauma".
They notified the Department of child services, who questioned my husband and myself our two boys 3 and 5, and immediately took the boys into custody. A flow study was done that determined blood flow was no longer reaching her brain and they immediately discontinued life support and she passed after being with us only 4 months.
They learned nothing damaging by their questioning of the boys, by having them phisically examined by Drs, or by their forced search of our home, yet they remain in foster care where they have been for 6 1/2 weeks while the investigation is ongoing. They are primarily awaiting the results of an autopsy. We have not been charged with anything at this point, though they threaten to charge my husband as well as myself even though he had been gone to work for more than 24 hours at the time.
I did not shake my daughter, and rather than mourning her loss I'm going through this nightmare instead. I do not abuse my boys, but by taking them away, the state is inflicting trauma on them that would be considered abuse. All I am gulity of is loving and brining an orphan into our home. The only thing I could hve done to prevent this was not care about her in the first place.
My boys wanted a sister, I wanted a little girl, It had been an intention since I was a child myself to give a home to a child in need. After a year of paper work, preparations and $30,000, I certainly didn't think it would end up like this. And to know so many others have been wrongly accused, and that there is so much evidence to sugest these injuries can be caused in other ways, it is disgusting to be treated with such bias, and as though I am gulity unless I can prove myself innocent. I don't know what to do.
We have a criminal lawyer trying to keep it out of criminal court, but it seems pretty hopeless. After the adoption expences our resources are pretty tapped out. My boys don't need to lose their sister and their mother. No one who knows me believes for a second I could be guilty. My older brother insists I'm too patient with my children. My pastor tells me repeatedly how everyone at church notices how good I am with children, how I handle sunday school and nursery. My husband and I have been missionaries to other countries and worked in orphanages. If nothing else I would appreciate your added prayers. I was touched by many of the things your site says. "
Nothing can change the tragedy of a baby’s death. But two wrongs do not make a right. Wrongfully depriving innocent children of their mother and a solid, secure childhood home only compounds the tragedy." Thank you.
RRK
Indiana
Can you please say some extra prayers for Kynan and Andy. They're not getting used to the separation like DCS would assume they would. They're crying more and more. Andy is falling apart. When they have to leave after a visit, it's painful for the supervisor to watch. Andy cried, "why does life have to be so terrible right now?" "why can't I sleep in my own bed?" He clings to my neck sobbing all over me, I can't keep it together then either.
Kynan cries, and his face melts and he reaches for me, buries his head in my shoulder, then looks like he just gives up, his face is blank, he's quiet. The supervisor says on the way back to the fosters, he regresses into not speaking. Andy asked for some of my lotion to remember me.
The supervisor told me they continued to talk about it during the drive back, and Andy said, "I just feel like there's no life left in my heart." He said he asks questions a 5 year old shouldn't have to ask.
I'm afraid if Andy keeps having this much trouble separating they'll discontinue visits. It's unbearable for me to have to physically pry his hands off me. I've not been able to convince anyone of the severity of how hard he's dealing with this. He needs some special grace and protection.
The councilor asked if we had any other ideas of what might help comfort them like the lotion, so if anyone else has suggestions.
It's tuff, the foster mom won't let them have food from home cause the other kids can't have it because of allergies, they're not allowed their toys from home because they're reluctant to share with the other children. It will probably be another 2 weeks before a ruling is made on family placement, but we have further documentation that shows more times DCS lied to us.