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[Marcus Momma]

This question is for those moms who have lost a baby then became pregnant again and had their baby. Does the emotions and stress get worse the closer you get and is it very stressful during the delivery? I have to have another c section and am scared I will freak out during it scared something will go wrong. How hard is it to be calm the closer you get?

[JenniferBrown]

I, honestly, had such a peace about myself when I got pregnant with my daughter. I had a tad bit of unease but really I was very peaceful about carrying her to term and delivering her with no problem. (My losses were before I had her)
When I was pregnant with my youngest son, I had a scare at 26 weeks or so (ultrasound tech trying to get me to NOT have a homebirth) and I was a little worried for a few weeks but the peace came back over me and he was fine and born at 37 weeks on the nose, fat and chubby as can be.

I can't offer advice on being pregnant so close after a loss though. It took 5 years to have Miranda.

[linda]

I had a hard pregnancy but during delivery Ethan and God were more present than ever in my life. I just knew everything would be just fine. I think you have to prepare yourself ~ I told myself I didn't want to mourn the loss of Ethan while I was welcoming Mason into this world and I did just that and honored Ethan in many ways while I was at the hospital. I just knew he was there because all the doctors and nurses had their NILMDTS lanyards on!! :)

[Kerry]

I think its normal to have all the if's and what not. My child was stillborn so my fear was at the end. My mother worried for me the most and called me every couple days to see how I was feeling since she was with me when the twins were born and remembered little details in how I was. My doctor kept always thinking in the positive that nothing would happen. I do remembering wanting to be induced at 38 weeks and he had a fit and said "Do you want to have a baby that will spend a few weeks in the NICU?" I was tired and freaked and said rudely I will pick a baby in the NICU then a stillborn baby!"
He said nothing and then said lets check you for dilation and I was a 4 and almost totally thinned and next morning I was in labor around 4am. Granted my son had he same infection as the girls since I had a work up done but all the vitamins and Heparin shots saved his life or I would of had another bad outcome. My doctor felt good how things went and was glad he came out when he did. My son was jauntice which all my kids were some crazy reason but he did end up coming home then 2 days later I had to put him back into the hospital for a few days to get it to go down. My neighbors thought something terrible had happen since I was screaming and crying outside putting him in the van to go. That is your pregnancy hormones coming out. Now to me didn't seem such a big thing but then you just want a healthy baby and enjoy being home. All I can say is go with your gut. Don't let your nerves get the best of you try to enjoy that moment , you won't get it back. My first child was natural and no drugs and I did alright with the pain of what you could. 2nd pregnancy with the twins was a C-section since Sarah butt was stuck as the plug. Mallory was head down so no way natural was going to happen. 3rd pregnancy I wanted a C-section then I could plan since I had other children at home to attend with my daughter going to Kindergarten. Doctor didn't care. He wanted me to go Natural. So did with drugs, my husband thought I was way more calmer and easier to deal with. I chuckle now.... I had my tubal ligation the next day and I feel at peace knowing my family is complete no more worries of carrying a child or the if's. Sorry I am getting off track its easy to do on this forum. It seems as time goes on we all known each other for years. I will say the days you are down just look up and know what you your doing for Marcus and how much he was loved here on earth and he will never be forgotten.The new little one will always be curious to know who he was to the family and will make it easier to talk about as time evolves and your new little one gets older. I love now when my kids ask question about Mallory they are so innocent and they are like sponges and remember everything.!

Kerry
Mother of Olivia,Sarah,Lane and Heavenly Angel Mallory

[MrsSpencer]

My friend has a six year old son (her son would've been ten in October) and she said he asks about Christian all the time. When she was pregnant with Ethan (six year old) she was terrified the whole time. He came early, but only a few weeks and turned out fine. I think it's natural fear when you've lost a baby, but I pray everynight that everyone here pregnant will be able to have happy healthy babies that they can bring home.

[motherofthree]

I'm glad you asked this, Shawnna. So far there hasn't been any pattern to my good versus my bad pregnancy moments. Sometimes I am terrified, and sometimes I feel peace and just think that everything is OK. I hope it doesn't get worse!

[Marcus Momma]

Thank you all of words are really going to help. I agree I don't want to being this baby into the world with a fresh mind and not worrying about Marcus every second. There is nothing i can do for him now he has everything he could ever want or need besides his family but he's safer there and I know he will be there when his brother is born hopefully helping me keep him calm and not crying all the time. But I guess as long as he is crying hes still alive. Thank you. I just know i flipped out on the ob table when i delivered my first son scared he would end up like my daughter barely holding on but god let me keep her and I know what a blessing that is now. They had to give me something so i could drift to sleep to calm down i knocked the nose canula out of my nose and wouldn't quit crying and yelling is he ok. I am just scared I will do that again.