Baby showers...

[Candice]

I was just wondering how everyone was handling the whole baby shower situation this time around. Since I got pregnant so fast after the loss of my daughter they will be born less than a year apart and I though it would be rude to have another shower. However family and friends are insisting on throwing me not one but TWO showers AGAIN! We took back the big items from my daughter like the travel system, the play yard, the bedding etc but we kept everything else. Since we are having another girl all we really need is the big stuff again. I just feel wierd about it. Everyone keeos insisting that I deserve another shower and that I need to do everything for Audri that I did for Lexi. I also think that it will be emotionally difficult to have another shower so I think if I do have them I want my husband there for support. So I am just wondering where you all are on this topic?!?!? Are you having showers again?

[Tawnya]

I believe every baby deserves a shower. :) Have a fun co-ed shower and let your family and friends be near to support you. :)

[Austin's Momma]

My son only passed away about five weeks ago, so I have not been in your situation. However, when I was pregnant with him we had two showers planned--we had one when I was 28 weeks. The other was planned for later and I ended up delivering before that date. It was going to be an all girls shower...but anyway...The shower we did have was so much fun! I just had a cookout at my house (hotdogs, hamburgers, pasta salad, cupcakes, etc) and there were as many guys as girls there. It was just all of our friends and close family. There weren't any games (a request my husband made) but people did place dollar bets on whether they thought I was having a girl or boy. There were blue and pink balloons all over the floor and streamers hanging from the doorways. I had some games (bean bags, frisbies, etc) set up outside for the kids and adults too. It was on a weeknight, about 6:30--just a relaxing cookout with friends (and some gifts too). If you plan something like this, it might be less pressure. I hope that you find your own way to celebrate the little life inside of you.

[Marcus Momma]

I ended up selling most of my stuff from MArcus in that yard sale I had to raise money for his headstone. I really need one but I am not so sure if anyonw wants to give me one. I didn't have a shower with MArcus because I had a son 14 months before Marcus was born so I still had stuff left but I have nothing this time and don't know how to mention it to my family and friends. I am not sure if they will be willing to do one or come to one. You think they would since I need everything but a baby bed. My other son broke his bouncy seat and swing and highchair so I don't have any of those things and I have some clothes left from Marcus I didn't let go but not very many. I say yay to the shower and really hope someone throws me one this time even though its getting a lot closer.

Shawnna

[Vicki]

Candice . . .

My guess is that many people around felt very helpless when you lost your baby . . . not knowing what to do, what to say, how to help. They probably really want to give you a shower as a way to actually be able to help you in some way. They couldn't do anything to change what happened to you and your family but by giving you a shower they will feel like they are helping now. I love the idea of turning it into a family affair instead of a bunch of hens . . . it certainly would make it more interesting and fun and would give EVERYONE that loves you a chance to share that moment with you and your family. Plus you would have your husband there and he wouldn't feel outnumbered by a bunch of women if you invited families. It doesn't take anything away from your Lexi . . . you can even include her in the event if you want with a little tree planting ceremony or something . . .
Let us know how it goes . . .

Vicki

[Lacey Canaday]

I do not think that I will be having one this time around,,, I kept everything from Sophia,,i just could not stand getting rid of anything. I am taking this one step at a time, even if this babe is a boy,,,I will buy stuff myself. I would have one if someone threw one for me. It will just be a little hard. They are fun go for it.

[Christine Barrack]

I didn't want a baby shower after my angel when I became pregnant the second time. It was so hard to return the things I got I didn't want to do it again. My family and friends insisted on giving one. I declined many times and agreed to an all family and friends pot luck-no gifts, just time to be together. The pot luck get together was so nice. I really need to have their support. I had everyone bring their baby books and family pictures to share. The neighborhood we lived in planted a flower garden in memory of my angel during the pot luck. After delivery I had a come meet baby baby shower. Those that sent gifts prior to delivery I kept in a closet and brought them out for the baby shower. Some didn't understand but it is the way I could deal with it. Do what is right for you and don't be afraid of what others think. If someone wants to give you a shower and you want that then great. If not that is fine to express that to them and they will understand.
Thinking of you,
Christine

[efswsjuly17]

Marcusmomma--- If I lived closer to you I would throw you a BIG baby shower!!! Every mom deserves to have a shower for their baby no matter what. I can understand how everyone feels about baby showers though, to each their own as they say, but I would definately want to celebrate another life that God has given us.

Brandy

[Marcus Momma]

Thanks. I hadn't thought of the idea of having one after the baby was born that way it would be an easier thing to deal with and to take a newborn baby to and show off. My daughters baby shower actually fell after she was born because she was born early.


Shawnna

[JenniferBrown]

Candice . . .

My guess is that many people around felt very helpless when you lost your baby . . . not knowing what to do, what to say, how to help. They probably really want to give you a shower as a way to actually be able to help you in some way. They couldn't do anything to change what happened to you and your family but by giving you a shower they will feel like they are helping now. I love the idea of turning it into a family affair instead of a bunch of hens . . . it certainly would make it more interesting and fun and would give EVERYONE that loves you a chance to share that moment with you and your family. Plus you would have your husband there and he wouldn't feel outnumbered by a bunch of women if you invited families. It doesn't take anything away from your Lexi . . . you can even include her in the event if you want with a little tree planting ceremony or something . . .
Let us know how it goes . . .

Vicki

I agree with Vicki 100%. I'm betting they just want to help you celebrate your new little girl's life and try to give you positive thoughts and very positive memories. :) I'd let them give you a shower. If they want to do it, and you DO need some 'big ticket items' stuff for her, go for it!