It's Fathers Day

[Scott Hays]

I received a simple note this morning, basically saying "Lindsey is proud of her daddy". Made me feel great! I know Zach and Kaley are more than likely proud of their father, but to have someone remember Lindsey today, was especially heartwarming for me.

I just wanted to pass the same sentiments along to all our fathers. All of our children are proud of us, no matter where they are. I hope you are as proud as they are.

Scott

[Karla]

Scott,
I want to say Happy Father's day to you and all the other Dads though belated. I also wanted to say thanks for sharing all your deepest feelings about Lindsey. I am sorry for your loss. Since reading how you feel I have wondered about my husband's feelings since our loss. He does not like to talk about Cydney Paige, and seems to get annoyed when I do which is everyday, moment etc. He only opened up a little on the eve of father's day. I so wish he would talk to me, I know that men grieve differently though what you talk about seems no different from what us women feel. I know he hurts too, but he seems to have just gone right back to life before Cydney Paige and I find myself getting angry about this. I want to hear him say that he feels the void too, that he too finds it difficult to get through the day, and seems to woander around aimlessly.

I have just finished reading "no mountain too high" by Ned Levitt. A father who lost his daughter on August 30th 1995. I have found it to be a very good read and strongly recommend that you read it, Scott.


Warmest regards,
Karla

[CMatros]

My husband is also having problems when talking about our little Anna. Generally if one of us is down we always say that we are "having a moment." Then the "moment" will pass. But he won't talk. He says that he needs to be strong for me...but I also want to be strong for him. We're only 26....and being this young and only married 3 years, it really puts a strain on us at times.....any suggestions????:(

[lancelevan]

please excuse me...i am new to this. it has only been 236 days, 7 hours, and approx. 35 minutes since my boy was taken from me. my wife and i are having extreme difficulty talking to each other about our son. and after i read your post...i figured out why. i don't mind talking to OTHER people about him...or my pastor...or a therapist...but not my wife. MY reason is that if she and i talk about him together...we BOTH lose it. i don't mind crying about my son...but i am still a man and i don't like to sit and bawl for hours (even though i DO in the privacy of my home-office). if i talk to someone else about my son...i cry for a few minutes...and then i'm back to "normal". if i do this with my wife...we could lose control for several hours. i hope this offers SOME explanation for why he does what he does...and everyone is different...so i'm not saying that this IS why...its just another possibility.

lance